Howdy, folks and kin! This here is Judd Jugmonger. Now, I ain’t written in some time on account of I’ve been floatin’ ‘round like a loose barge in a hurricane on the Mississippi River. I is in Miami now, and I tell y’all what—even though them buildin’s is gettin' higher n' higher, that thar Magic City, where I was born, is goin’ to hell in a handbasket! Every time I come back here, it just gets worse n' worse, or as them Hispanish folk say, “Mi casa es tu caca.”
They gots homeless people over here, and more homeless people over there, and them city officials ain’t doin’ squat but gettin’ their pictures taken whenever they find a quarter on the ground. Of course, a big issue is the that thar climate change, but them developers and City of Miami Board of Commiserators (city officials on-the-take) are just grabbin’ money hand over fist to keep buildin’ them monstrosities before the bottom falls out—and I do mean that literarily! That's what Miami has become, nothin' but a MonstrosCity.
In another post, Imma gonna write about them tall buildings’ and such, whose ownin’ them and how everyone local and in the workforce is gittin’ priced outta this town. It's called gentrification which is different from them past geriatricification. Butt, today I’m gonna talk about them mass-transpit transportation issues.
In them interests of humanity, I startin’ goin’ on the Twitter to tweet me some humanitarian whatnot fer all y’all out there. You can follow me there at: @Jugmongers
On the Twitter, I’ve been sharin’ some comments on a Miami History Walking Tour I’ve been doin’ where I give some idears ‘bout the city’s history—the kind them rich folks hate cause they wasn’t in it, so they try to pay their way in. You how them is, all them folks like them Firestones, Rocketfellers, Bramahams, and all them highfallutin’ Miami Beach mayors what don’t do much but pick lint from between their toes on Fisher Island and stuff their faces at Roasters Toasters on 41st Street. True history oughtsta be preserved as it is and as everyone knows it. But, it seems, just like everythin' else in MIami, some folks wanna be revisin’ it. So, I aim to stick it in their face—and the history, too!
Another stop on my Historical Miami 🦎 Walkin' Tour! Some folks say in 1947, this UFO landed in #MiamiBeach. Some aliens, what looked like them bass fishies, got out and signed an arts treaty with President Truman. Yes, it was a trap. #FishFry #History https://t.co/x7I8VJBAYS pic.twitter.com/OCqvxcf6W2
— Judd Jugmonger (@Jugmongers) December 28, 2022
Once I got on them twitterverses, I seen lots of folks what we’re goin on ‘bout how dumb them Miami-Dade County Government is what is runnin’ the show poorly. Them commiserators and city manglers don’t know which end is up. They can’t even git them escalators runnin’ at the city’s Metromover stations and them elevators at the Metrorail stations. It’s a disaster on the “Oh, the humanity!” level—just like that thar Hindenberg airship disaster.
