Sunday, November 1, 2009

Judd Jugmonger's NFL Picks - Week 8

Howdy Folks! This here is Judd Jugmonger and I just posted me up my poscast fer y'all with my picks fer week 8. Now, you might be able to understandin' that my voice this week is a bit slow. The truth is I'm jsut plu tuckered out from all that singin' us Jugmongers did at the Halloween Hootennany in Juno last night. But, as they say the show must go on like that thar little pinl Energizer hare. So here is the transcript from my show:

Well howdy folks! This here is Judd Jugmonger, once again live from the Katywonkered Cafe' - and this here is muh picks fer Week 8 of the NFL, that thar's the Nat-ee-onal Football League. Where there's a full-back, a half-back and quarterback ... but thar ain't no fiddlebacks ... though I reckon if a y'all like Bluegrass music as a much as I do you mind a few in the stands.

Now last week, I picked 8 of them games. Yes sir - that thar was good I reckon' ... 'cept no one sent me some of that thar BBQ sauce I asked ya to git me! Well, maybe this week y'all will be more kindly especially as I'm all fired up after singin' all night at the Halloween Hootenanny. So Let's get on it.

Carolina Panthers (2-4) at Arizona Cardinals (4-2)
Ok, first up is them Panthers vs. Cardinals. Will them kitties git the bird? I think so .... but it won't be the eatin' kind.

San Francisco 49ers (3-3) at Indianapolis Colts (6-0)
All right, that was an easy one. Now we got us them Colts vs them 49ers. I reckon there's a gonna be a stampede. Them boys from San Francisco are a gonna end up lookin' like rice-a-roni ... and you know that thar will be Peyton Manning's eatin' treat. Now them 49ers have been makin' some moves on their roster ... but uh ... I think them movements are as about as useful as a trap door in a canoe.

Houston Texans (4-3) at Buffalo Bills (3-4)
Ok now we got us them Texans vs. them Bills. This one here is a toss up. So I just spun my little pigskin what I got and it pointed to them Texans.... now I think Buffalo Boys have more to lose than a fat tick that's a gonna squashed ... but I think them Houston boys are a gonna give them a few wrinkles ... and my little pigskin agrees. So, go with the Texans, Hoss.

Cleveland Browns (1-6) at Chicago Bears (3-3)
All right we got us them Browns vs. them Bears. Knock Knock .... who's that thar ... "Bear Claw" ... uh ... Bear claw who's that thar? Bear claw ... and that's all she wrote. Them Browns are a gonna have to changes their names to black and blues.

Jacksonville Jaguars (3-3) at Tennessee Titans (0-6)
Next up is them 3 and 3 Jaguars vs. them 0 and 6Titans. Will this be the week that Tennessee is a gonna see a victory? I reckon not. Them Jacksonville boys are a gonna go through them faster than green grass through a goose!

St. Louis Rams (0-7) at Detroit Lions (1-5)
All right, next up we go us them 0 and 7 Rams vs them 1 and 5 Lions. I's the Loser's Bowl! Swing low sweet chariot comin' forth to carry the "poor rams" home. I tell you what if someone's a gonna walk out that thar outhouse smellin' like flowers it's a gonna be them Lions. I'll say it again, poor rams.

Seattle Seahawks (2-4) at Dallas Cowboys (4-2)
- Ok, next up it's them Seahawks and then Cowboys. Hmmm. Tony Romo vs. Matt Hassleback. I think that thar football is a gonna be airborn so much this week's, it's a gonna sprout wings. So who's a gonna git the Pabst blue ribbon? Well, I think them Cowboys have got the edge and they will find way to throw them Seattle boys over it.

Minnesota Vikings (6-1) at Green Bay Packers (4-2)
- Ok, now we got us a game to watch. If thar's a few a you what like watchin' Nascar a hopin' fer a crash, well this here will be a game fer you. Bert Favre and his Vikings are a gonna show up with the ugly stick and when they're through they're a gonna make them Green Bay boys sooo ugly they could run a dog off a meat wagon. The Packers will ride the short bus home from the stadium. Sorry, boys.

New York Giants (5-2) at Philadelphia Eagles (4-2)
Ok, it's them Giants vs. them Eagles. Hey y'all remember in that thar King Kong movie when them little planes were a buzzin' round that overgrown monkey what was on the Empire State Buildin'? Remember how that thar Donkey Kong swatted them down like gnats on a backside? Well that's what Eli Manning and Company is a gonna do to them Philadelphia birds. The only things flyin' on Sunday will be some buzzards lookin' fer Eagle roadkill.

Miami Dolphins (2-4) at New York Jets (4-3)
All right, fer me this here is the game of the week. It's my Dolphins vs. them Jets. Come on you wildcat! Now I tell you what, in all my born days I'd never such rotten officiatin' during that thar game what we had last week against them Saints. Them striped zebras boys oughts to be tar and feathered fer them calls. And I still got me the shakes from that thar 2nd half metldown! But this week is another week and like I always say ... tomorrow is another day. ... and I reckon it's another game the Jets will take a nose dive. Hope Mark Sanchez won't be wearin' white!

Oakland Raiders (2-5) at San Diego Chargers (3-3)
Now it's them Chargers vs. them Raiders.... ok quick pick .... cause a this one's a gonna be a stinker! There will be as many thrills as watchin a pack a slow movin' turtles. I'd go with them Chargers, but I could just as easily say them Raiders... and that thar's the truth! If there's a shuffle board match on TV ... well, go ahead and watch it then.

Denver Broncos (6-0) at Baltimore Ravens (3-3)
All right! It's them 6 and 0 Broncos vs. them 3 and 3 Ravens. Now I think, that if thar's an undefeated team what is gonna lose this week .. well ... it won't be them Ravens. I prognosticate the Ravens will fly high again and the only way them Broncos are gonna be able to share the air with them will be if and they git on back to "Mile High" stadium.

Atlanta Falcons (4-2) at New Orleans Saints (6-0)
All right it's Monday Night Football and it's them 4 and 2 Falcons vs. them Saints 6 and 0 Saints. Call me crazier than dog what's been run over ... but I think them Saints are a gonna fall to them Falcons .... HAHA - Just Joshin' with you folks! It will take a miracle for them Atlanta boys to go a peckin on them New Orleans boys any higher than their toes.

All right! That's it's fer me folks. That thar is muh picks! Now, I tell you what, as it's the 1st of November, the holiday season is just around the corner. So I'm gettin' a hankerin' fer some pumpkin pie. Well, fer all a you folks who will be plannin' what to buy their friends and kin with all that thar money from my picks what I just gave you well, don't ferget me!. Heck, I'd be happy if ya send me even a little slice, but don't ferget that thar whipped toppin! Just spray some on thar fer me. So git on over to - that's jugmongers with a "J" - and set me up with some of that pumpkin pie!

This here is Judd Jugmonger signin' off with a Halloween incantation: "Double, double toil and trouble; fire burn and cauldron bubble ... send ole' Judd Jugmonger some pumpkin pie on the double." I thank you. I thank you very much.

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