Sunday, December 27, 2009
Buffalo Bills (5-9) at Atlanta Falcons (7-7)
Ok, first up we got us them Bills and them Falcons. Them Atlanta boys ain't goin' to the playoffs, and ... well, I ain't done the math, but I reckon that neither are them Buffalo boys. But them birdies do have somethin' to play for and that is a winnin' record ... in fact they can make it 2 years in row beginnin' this weekend. So go with the motivation and give them Bills the chills.
Kansas City Chiefs (3-11) at Cincinnati Bengals (9-5)
Ok, nest is them 3 and 11 Chiefs vs. them 9 and 5 Bengals. They say, if at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Well, the kitties have their "try and try again" to get them in the payoffs. They is a gonna try again. I think playin' them lowly Chiefs is a blessin' from above. Know what I mean? I think you do.
Oakland Raiders (5-9) at Cleveland Browns (3-11)
Alright. Now we got us them Raider and them Brown. Let's see here ... them Raiders ain't playin' for nothing and them Brown, at least are playing for their new Team manager ... and whoever it is is a gonna be their new coach come the end of the season. So who's gonna suck it up the most and win the Pabst Blue Ribbon? Well, I tell you what, I think it's gonna be them Cleveland boys.
Seattle Seahawks (5-9) at Green Bay Packers (9-5)
Ok, up next is them Seahawks vs. the, play off bound Packers. Do to do to do to do ... ok heck folks, you know it's them Packers what gonna win this here game. Them Seattle boys lost to Tampa Bay last week and got them some lumps a coal form ole' Santa ... what does that tell you?
Houston Texans (7-7) at Miami Dolphins (7-7)
All right now it's my Dolphins vs. them Texans. Both teams are 7 and 7 and in the playoff hunt. But only ones comes away with a winning record ... in the end there can only be one. I'm gonna give Miami the edge here ... only cause they know they is a gonna have to make up for that thar disappointing loss last week. Don't let me down boys. As fer them Houston boys ... well sorry, Hoss. If ya don't like my pick I guess ya can go argue with a fence post.
Jacksonville Jaguars (7-7) at New England Patriots (9-5)
Next up is them Patriots and them Jaguars. Tom Brady and Company look to make it to the postseason with here, and them boys from Jacksonville. well they is still in the hunt, but is they hungry enough to claw them New England boys? I tell you what, I smell an upset in the making here, folks. I think them Patriots will ride the short bus home from the stadium. If not, it's gonna be a close one.
Tampa Bay Buccaneers (2-12) at New Orleans Saints (13-1)
Ok, yonder come them 13 and 1 Saints and them 2 and 12 Buccaneers. Yo-ho-ho? Ho-ho-no! Saints all the way!
Carolina Panthers (6-8) at New York Giants (8-6)
All right, now we got us them Panthers and them Giants. Them Carolina boys ain't in the playoffs, and them Giants are still lookin' fer the door in. Desperation ... desperation .... Eli Manning is desperate ... and that ain't good fer them Panthers.
St. Louis Rams (1-13) at Arizona Cardinals (9-5)
Ok, now we got us them Cardinals. Poor Cardinals. You know why? Cause they get to play them poor Rams. It ain't no stinker bowl ... cause them Arizoney boys are in the playoff. But seein' how foul them Rams is ... well we just hope some of that stink don't rub off a them. Go with Cardinals ... duh.
Baltimore Ravens (8-6) at Pittsburgh Steelers (7-7)
Alright now we got us them Ravens and them Steelers. Them Baltimore boys are wildcards and them Steelers boys are wanna be's. They is gonna be a dottin' them eyes and crossin' them Ts and whatever else it is they gots. I think them metal heads are hungrier than them birdies.... but still, I think them birdies are gonna peck a few holes in them Pittsburgh boys. Go with them Ravens and to the Steelers say, nevermore.
Detroit Lions (2-12) at San Francisco 49ers (6-8)
Alright it ain't them Rams and it ain't Buccaneers but it sure smells like the Stinker Bowl to me. That's right folks, when you are sad and lonely and gots no place to go, git ye' your clothes pins and stick them on your nose! Cause it's the Stinker Bowl! And this week, wavin' their banners low is them 2 and 12 Lions and then 6 and 8 49ers. I tell you what that thar is a lots a numbers ... but they all add up to a win fer them San Francisco treats. Detroit .... well thar ain't much to say thar except ... peeyoo!
New York Jets (7-7) at Indianapolis Colts (14-0)
Ok, next up is them 7 and 7 Jets vs. them un beaten Colts. Hey, what do you say that Matt Ryan decides he's got somethin' to prove against Peyton Manning? Is that a chance that them Colts lose this week? Maybe so ... it's hard to imagine .. but if y'all want to win some big money go with them Jets. I think them Indianapolis boys are gonna do their regular bang up job ... but I tell you what ... I got an itch wants to be scratched ... so officially, I'm gonna on a record by sayin' this may be the week, them Colts don't smell pay dirt.
Denver Broncos (8-6) at Philadelphia Eagles (10-4)
All right now we got us them Broncos vs. them Eagles. The Philadelphia boys are in them playoffs and them Denver boys are wild cards. So I just spun me my little pigskin on this one and it pointed to them Eagles. What do you say about that? Not much I reckon ... unless your them Broncos.
Dallas Cowboys (9-5) at Washington Redskins (4-10)
Hey, now we got us some Cowboys and Injuns. Dallas is a wildcard team ... Washington, well they could play in the Stinker Bowl. Tony Romo ... that's all you need to hear folks.
Minnesota Vikings (11-3) at Chicago Bears (5-9)
Alright, now we got some Monday Night Football! It's them 11 and 3 Vikings vs. them 5 and 9 Bears. With 2 straight losses under his belt, Bert Favre might need him a little teddy bear to make him feel snuggly wuggly. I reckon he'll have his pick this week. It don't look good fer them Chicago boys who is a gonna git skint.
All right! That's it's fer me folks. That thar is muh picks! Now, I tell you what, Christmas my be over, but the spirit of givin' is till upon us .. especially those what will be buyin' some cases of New Year's champagne what with all that money from my picks what I just gave you . So don't ferget me! I still got a few payments left on that that Telecaster what I got on layaway. So git on over to www.jugmongers.com - that's Jugmongers with a "J" - and set me up with a few seasonal greetin's, you know ... them green one.
Ok. so this here is Judd Jugmonger signin' off from the Katywonkered Cafe' with some words a sagely advice: "Should old acquaintances be forgot ... go ahead and make them a barbecue."
Friday, December 4, 2009
Ok, first up we got us an easy one. It's them Colts vs. them Titans. Peyton Manning and Company is still undefeated. ... and them Titans is ... well undefeated since they got them selves a new "young" quartyback. Do y'all reckon this will be his first taste of defeat? ... or in the Colts' case - de-hooves? I reckon so.
Houston Texans (5-6) at Jacksonville Jaguars (6-5)
Ok, that thar was easy. nest up is them 5 and 6 Texans vs. them 6 and 5 Jaguars. On paper, I'd say the them kitties should git the best of them Houston boys - what with them playoff bound ... but don't count out them Texans, yet - at least as the math goes. Still, I'd go with the Jaguars. I think they got themselves a bit more "grrrr" in their bellies. Sorry, Hoss.
Oh Carolina, oh don't you cry fer me, I ain't goin to the Stinker Bowl - but you are! That's right folks, When you are sad and lonely and gots no place to go, git ye' your clothes pins and stick them on your nose! Cause it's the Stinker Bowl! And this week, wavin' their banners low is them 1 and 10 Buccaneers and them 4 and 7 Panthers. Ok, the Panthers still got a shot to make them playoffs - a long shot - but a shot. And them Tampa Bay boys will give be kind enough to give them a hand. Maybe they should change the name of the team to the Tampa Bay Samaritans.
All right, now we got us the, undefeated Saints and them lowly 3 and 8 Redskins. Stay in your Teepees boys - and no one will git hurt. The choir boys can be brutal.
Speakin' of prayin' ... next we got us my Dolphins vs. them Patriots. I ain't even gonna mention how many bottles a moonshine I had to wrestle off a cousin Jed last week to drown my sorrows in last weeks Miami misery. I reckon the Patriots and Tom Brady are comin' into ole Landshark stadium awfully confident. And they should be. Still, I think Miami even though they're under 500 again, has got a surpise or two up their dorsal fins. Go with the underdogs, folks.
Ok, now we got us them Eagles vs. them Falcons. It's a bird fight folks! Feathers a flyin' this way and that - It ain't a gonan be a dog fight - even though Michael Vick will be thar. Speakin' a quartybacks - uh Matt Ryan got him the turf toe and will be doin' butt duty on the bench this week. So I say, that them Eagles will fly away oh lordy I'll fly away .... just like that thar bluegrass song. Do do do ... "Fly like an eagle to the sea" .. fly like an Eagle go git your birdy victory.
Ok next up is them 7 and 4 Broncos vs. them 3 and 8 Chiefs. Look out fer the Stampede! It's gonna be ugly. The Chiefs git trampled - and don't you know it.
All right, next up them Raiders go to Pittsburgh to raid them Steelers - but Roethslinger is back from concussion la-la land. So them Oakland boys will be busier than a Rooster in a hen house.... though ... uh ... they won't be playin' the part uh the Rooster. Know what I mean? I think you do!
Ok, now I tell you what, this next games comes might close to bein' another Stink Bowl, what with we got us here them 1 and 10 Rams and them 4 and 7 Bears. But I think this here will be a good game cause either it's gonna be them Rams a celebrtin' their 2nd victory beatin up on a bunch a Gummy Bears ... or its gonna be them Polar Bears puttin' them "Poor Rams" on ice. You know what I think it's a gonna be fun watchin' the Rams win another one .... but they probably won't. Poor Rams.
What else we got us here, let's see, it's the Kitty Bowl them 2 and 9 Lions vs. them 8 and 3 Bengals. Uh ... gonna save my breath here ... them Tigers git to growl ... them Lions - just a Meow and they git send off to play in the Kitty Litter.
All right, next is them 8 and 3 Chargers vs. them 1 and 10 Browns. The Browns will git electrocutes and take the short bus home from the their own stadium. Peyoo!
Ok yonder come them 49ers vs. them Seahawks. Them San Francisco boy are above 500 .. them Seattle boys, ain't. Some folks say theirs a no surprises here ... but I tell you what. I think them Seahawks are a gonna pull this one out and win the Pabst Blue Ribbon. Heck even my little pigskin what I spun, says so.
And now it's them Cowboys vs. them Giants. Both these teams are hungry. Them Dallas boys got their eyes on that that thar NFC East title. Meanwhile, them Giants got their eyes on Eli Manning's foot that's a smartin's some. Well it don't take much smarts to know that them Cowboys are gonna ride them, Giants outta their own towm.
Ok, now it's them Vikings and them Cardinals. Burt Favre vs. Kurt Warner. One a them is a gonna git caught with their pants down. Now Warner went to concussion la-la-land fer a week. Had him his head in them clouds ... this week his head will be back down around his ankles I suspect.
All right, it's uh, Monday Night Football, with them Ravens vs. them Packers. This one's a gonna be close. Them Green Bay boys got them a wildcard, while them Baltimore boys are still in the hunt. If y'all ask me, which I suspect y'all are since y'all are a listenin' to this here podcast - well I say them Packer's defense is a gonna can them birds. It won't be spam in a can ... but it won't be corned beef neither. Go with them Packers!
Sunday, November 29, 2009
Howdy Folks! I'm back and have just put up my podcast picks fer week 12 of the NFL! Ok, so here is the transcript ... and pay close attention to the end where I mentioned a Fender Telecaster! As Chuck Berry says, "all I want fer christmas is a rock and roll electric guitar" ... though I reckon I'll just do some country pickin' on it!
Well howdy folks and kin! This here is Judd Jugmonger, once again live from the Katywonkered Cafe' and I'm back a rarin' to go with my licks fer Week 12 of the NFL, that thar's the National Football League, where the Lion's play every thanksgiving fer 4 quarters ... and still one has ever won a buck on'em. This year, they lost again! Ah, holiday traditions ... ain't they a hoot? Now I hope y'all got some good eatin' in on Thanksgivin'. I know I did! I'm still as stuffed with as much cornbread stuffing as that thar turkey was.
Now a some a y'all might be a wonderin' where I was fer the last two weeks. Well, see y'all might not know it but uh I'm in a Bluegrass Band called ... well "the Jugmongers". And well, we had us some heavy tourin' to do on the road playin' at some great hootenannies and honky tonks. So I thought I'd take me a "bye" week just like them players do. But I ended up takin' a "bye bye" week cause we run out a gas somewhere North a Jupiter and South a Juno. Y'all know what I mean? I think you do! If y'all wanna hear some a our bluegrass music recorded live, git on over to www.myspace.com.jugmongers - that thar's Jugmongers with a "J". And uh, you can hear me pickin' the guitar and playin' the harp and singin' with my sweety deety, Jolene. Alright, so I'm back and as they say across that thar pond "right as the wind", so here we go.
Now, just a quick night cap ... uh I mean recap of them game what were played on Turkey day. Uh, Let's see them Green Bay Packers sent them Detroit Lions a packin' - no surprise thar. And, them Dallas Cowboys shot up them Oakland Raiders - that was a no brainer! And them Denver Broncos beat up on them New York Giants. Well, that thar was a cryin' shame fer that youngin' quarteyback. Ok, so it's on to Sunday's games, and here we go...
Tampa Bay Buccaneers (1-9) at Atlanta Falcons (5-5)
All right, first up we got us them Buccaneers vs. them Falcons. It seems we do this dance every week in and out, folks. So grab your partner and dosey doe ... in Tampa Bay there's no Yo-Ho-Ho. Falcolns at the stadium scratching out dough ... Buccaneers goin' home with o-o-o's. Buck take thar zero!
Indianapolis Colts (10-0) at Houston Texans (5-5)
Ok, next up is them Colts vs. them Texans. Now the Texans are 5 up and 5 down. The Colts, of course, are undefeated. Now I reckon that some folks think that this here is the week that Peyton Manning and Company will lose their first game. Now I know the holiday's are a comin', so I reckon that y'all must got all worked on fruiticake or somethin' ... cause that thar notion is nuttier than a pecan log ... or a fruitcake ... or somethin'. Now them Houston boys have lost 2 in row and I says "misery loves company" ... so they is a gonna make it 3. Sorry Hoss!
Miami Dolphins (5-5) at Buffalo Bills (3-7)
Alright, this here is my game of the week. It's my Fin svs. them Bills. The Fins got them 2 wins in a row and that last game, what with Ricky Williams steppin' up fer "lost fer the season" Ronnie Brown, wasn't an easy game to win. But them boys did me proud ... and Ricky, well he's a hero and wins the Pabst Blue Ribbon. Now, them Miami boys need a win need a win to keep them in the hunt fer the wild cards... so this week they is a gonna go a huntin' fer Buffalo. It's a division game and them Bills got nothing to lose. So that's what they'll take home this week, a whole lot a nothin'!
Washington Redskins (3-7) at Philadelphia Eagles (6-4)
Ok, next up is them Redskins, what go to Philadelphia a lookin' fer them Eagles. I tell you what it might be a whole lot easier to get on over to the Walmart and git them some day after Thanksgiving frozen turkey, or maybe a can a spam or somethin', cause them Eagles ain't gonna do nothin' but fly off with a victory this week. Redskins?Well, I guess they can go home with that can a spam.
Chicago Bears (4-6) at Minnesota Vikings (9-1)
All right, now we got us them Vikings vs. them Bears. Now, see this here is the point in the season where it's gits a bit easier to prognosticate what's a gonna go down. I reckon ole' Burt Favre is a gonna declaw them bears again. Not much else thar.... it is what is.
Carolina Panthers (4-6) at New York Jets (4-6)
Ok, this here's an interestin' game. It's them Panthers vs. them Jets. Let's see, them kitties are feelin' poorly and them Jets ... well they're runnin' out a gas. Mark Sanchez laid a bunch a rotten eggs last week in New England and most folks are wonderin' whether's there's any meat left on that bone. Now, them Panthers' are lookin' fer a wildcard ... and I think they got the edge here. So go with them kitties! The Jets will ride the short bus home from the stadium a compliments a Mark Sanchez who will be drivin'.
Arizona Cardinals (7-3) at Tennessee Titans (4-6)
Now, it's them Cardinals vs. them Titans. Them boys from Tennessee have won four in a row and they is on a roll! Kurt Warner! Well, he ate him some dirt last week and might be, as the King says "I'm all shook up, a hey hey, hey baby! Now my head is hittin' the ground" - Oh, and I suspect that most folks think he'll be rattled up this week. So, I'm gonna go with them Titans, too, but also cause I think things are a lookin' up fer them Titans ... uh pardon the pun, ya son of a gun.
Cleveland Browns (1-9) at Cincinnati Bengals (7-3)
All right, next up is them Browns vs. them Bengals. Uh huh, not much to say here, folks. Go with them Bengals - and y'all want to now why? Well, it's because it don't take a roto-rooter to know what's in that thar Cleveland outhouse!
Seattle Seahawks (3-7) at St. Louis Rams (1-9)
Ok , next up, well here we go! From the Cleveland outhouse straight to the Stinker Bowl, that's right! When you are sad and lonely and gots no place to go, git ye' your clothes pins and stick them on your nose!Cause it's the Stinker Bowl! And this week, wavin' their banners low is them 3 and 7 Seahawks vs. them, you guessed it, them 1 and Rams. Hey, y'all think the Rams a got a snow ball in hell's chance a winnin' this here game? Some folks do. But me and myself says - a no! And, we is unanimous! Poor Rams! And guess what? Them boys from Seattle are a finally gonna win one onthe road! It won't be pretty and it's gonna be messy, but hell it's the Stinker Bowl! And that's what outhouses are a made for.
Jacksonville Jaguars (6-4) at San Francisco 49ers (4-6)
All right, now we got us them Jaguars vs. them 49ers. I tell you what, one team is 4 and 6 and them others is 6 and 4. Sounds like a 6 a one and half a dozen of the other, so I just spun me my little pigskin and it pointed to them kitties. And, I agree cause them Jaguars are just better in passin', rushin' and totals yards. The 49ers, well heck, Greenbay deep-sixed them last week and I reckon they're a just gonna stay down thar in the dumps fer another week.
Kansas City Chiefs (3-7) at San Diego Chargers (7-3)
Ok, now it's them 3 and 7 Chiefs (cha cha) vs. them 7 and 3 Chargers (cha cha cha). Uh huh ... this one makes makin' mashed potater's look easy! Go with them Chargers. (cha cha cha!).
Pittsburgh Steelers (6-4) at Baltimore Ravens (5-5)
Ok, yonder come them Steelers and them Ravens. Ok, now Roethslinger is another Quartey back what ate dirt last week and went to la-la-land fer a bit - so I bet Baltimore's Joe Flacco what goes whacko, reckons he'll be able strut Raven feathers a bit. Still, I think, his feathers will just git ruffled, whether Roethslinger plays or not. Go with them Steelers!
New England Patriots (7-3) at New Orleans Saints (10-0)
Alright! It's Monday Night Football and, game a the week fer y'all. This here's a gonna be a good one. It's them undefeated Saints what play host to them 7 and 3 Patriots. If and them Saint's are a hopin' to fell them Patriots like a hollow log, they're barkin' up the wrong tree. Tom Brady's gonna git mean. Still, I think them Saints are packin' a heavin' helpin of Holy Moly ... and they will come out ahead. Looks like Reggie Bush is a gonna play some, I reckon. And, Drew Brees? Eell you just call him the breeze and he'll keep them Saints ablowin' down the road to the Super Bowl.
All right! That's it's fer me folks. That thar is muh picks! Now, I tell you what, as y'all know the holiday's, well they is upon us! And since, as the song goes, 'tis the season to be jolly by golly ms. molly - all y'all what will be countin' your bucks what with all that money from my picks what I just gave you, can send me a tip so I can git me a new guitar ... a Telecaster fer some country pickin'. ... got me one on layway ... it's a Fender .... and I won't bend her, if y'all do right be my. So git on over to www.jugmongers.com - that's jugmongers with a "J" - and set me up with that thar Telecaster.
This here is Judd Jugmonger signin' off from the Katywonkered Cafe' with some words a holiday words wisdom: When they say that pants are half off in the K-Mart or Walmart or any old mart .... make sure they ain't yours!
Thursday, November 5, 2009
Well howdy folks and kin! This here is Judd Jugmonger, once again live from the Katywonkered Cafe' - and this here is muh picks fer Week 9 of the NFL, that thar's the National Football League, where 4 quarters add up to whole heapin' lot more than just 1 buck. Now last week, I picked 9 of them games. Yes sir - that thar was good, I reckon! So let's get on it, cause them tail gater's are a gittin' jumpy.
Green Bay Packers (4-3) at Tampa Bay Buccaneers (0-7)
All right first up we got us them Packers vs. them Buccaneers. Now I reckon that most folks a feel that them Packers are a gonna beat up on them Tampa Bay boys fer the beatin' they took last week from Burt Favre and his purple people eaters. Heck, why not? Them Buccaneers at 0 and 7 look like easy targets. But I tell you what, I think there's a gonna be some a yo-ho-hoin' on Sunday as them Buccanners git their first win. Them Packers are gonna have to pack it on down the road. Sorry boys.
Kansas City Chiefs (1-6) at Jacksonville Jaguars (3-4)
Ok, next up is them Chiefs vs. them Jaguars. Now them Kansas City boys had a bye week to figure out which end is up where as them JAX kitties got buried in kitty litter last week. Now, generally speakin' - haha I said thar "General Lee" - uh, generally I like them Florida teams so I'm a gonna go with them Jaguars. The Chiifs are a gonna git rode hard and put up wet.
Baltimore Ravens (4-3) at Cincinnati Bengals (5-2)
Now, we got us them Ravens vs. them Bengals. This here's a gonna be a good game! It's Joe Flacco vs. Carson Palmer ... or Calson Parmer ... I forget. Anyways, a course there's whole mess a other players, too. But I reckon this game will be won in the air. Them birds need this win to save their season ... but I think them Cincinnati boys are a gonna' bring on the sacks to bag them some bird. Go with them Bengals!
Washington Redskins 2-5 at Atlanta Falcons (4-3)
Ok, yonder come them Redskins at 2 and 5 and them Falcons at 4 and 3. I think them Atlanta boys are a gonna bounce back from last week. Matt Ryan's a gonna show them Redskins how to scalp themselves. Go with Falcons cause a Washington's gonna fall out of that thar Falcon's nest and hit every branch on the way down.
Carolina Panthers (3-4) at New Orleans Saints (7-0)
Ok, now we got us them Panthers and them Saints. Oh, when them Saints come marchin'in' y'all better hide your Panther kin. Cause them Saints are in "Seventh Heaven" and I reckon they're a gonna git 8.
San Diego Chargers (4-3) at NY Giants (5-3)
All right, now is them Chargers vs. them Giants. Now, I tell you what, them Giants are a playin' finer than frog's hair ... so that's not sayin' much. Can Eli Manning git them a win o'er them Chargers? Well, at the end of day I think ole Phil Rivers will be eatin' them Giant's frog legs.
Miami Dolphins (3-4) at New England Patriots (5-2)
All right folks, game of the week fer me! This one here's divisional. My Dolphin swim on over to visit them New England Patriots. Now last week, my Fins found a way to win even with Teddie Gin! Imagine that! One minutes your in the dog house and the next your at the top of the four corners of the world. How about them Patriots? Tom Brady ... he ain't no Cindy from that thar Brady Bunch. He'll be a lookin' fer the Tuna this Sunday and won't mind canning them Dolphins as well. So who's a gonna win the Pabst Blue Ribbon? I says go with them Miami boys cause I think Tom Brady won't be able to stand up to Miami's pass rush.
Houston Texans (5-3) at Indianapolis Colts (7-0)
Next up is them Texans vs. them Colts. Hmm. Glory be, I tell you what ... this one's gonna be ugly. Now you know ole' Peyton's he's a gonna do his best, and so will Matt Schaub. But only one of them is a gonna take the Cherry pie ... and leave the pits fer with the other. Seein' as some of them Colts running backs are havin' a hard time a holdin' on to the pigskin ... well, I'm just a gonna go with them Colts. The Texans are a gonna shoot themselves in the footsies. Sorry, Hoss!
Arizona Cardinals (4-3) at Chicago Bears (4-3)
Ok, now we got us them Cardinals and them Bears. They're a both 4 and 3. One's got a Warner what's a 19th in passing, and the other's gotta Cutler what's a 20th in passing. So, I just spun me my little pigskin and, well it pointed to them Bears. I'm not surprised, cause them Cardinals are like last in rushing, but this week they're a gonna be first to rush off to the outhouse.
Detroit Lions (1-6) vs. them Seattle (2-5)
All right folks and kin, now we got us the Stinker Bowl, that's right. When you are sad and lonely and gots no place to go ... git you your clothes pins and put them on your nose. This week it's them 1 and 5 Lions vs. them 2 and 5 Seahawks. Now them Lions are so dull they couldn't cut nary a stick a hot butter - but they managed to win one last week. Hope they savor that thar win cause another is a gonna be a long time comin'. Go with them Seahawks.
Tennessee Titans (1-6) at San Francisco (3-4)
Ok. now it's the 1 and 6 Titans vs. then 3 and 4 49ers. Them boys from San Francisco lost last week and want to git back to "even Steven" so that means them Tennessee boys take the short bus home from the stadium. Let's be honest folks, if that thar Stinker Bowl took three teams, the Titams would be one of them.
Dallas Cowboys (5-2) at Philadelphia Eagles (5-2)
All right not we got us them Cowboys vs. them Eagles. Both a these here teams are 5 and 2 - but only one of them is gonna make it 6 and it ain't gonna be the Eagles. I'm gonna be intellectual about this. If y'all look at the stats betwixt these two teams, it's like the only one them Philadelphia boys are ahead on is puntin'. So go with the Cowboys and yippee caye' your on your way.
Pittsburgh Steelers (5-2) vs. Denver Broncos (6-1)
All right, it's Monday Night Football and them Steelers go up to Denver to face them Broncos. This here is a gonna be a good game. Now them Broncos have been stampedin' ... until last week that when they came up against an even wilder herd a Colts. And, them Pittsburgh boys, well they're a all warmed up and in high gear. But I reckon, it' just won't be enough. Better luck next week.
All right! That's it's fer me folks. That thar is muh picks! Now, I tell you what, as I said, the holiday's is a just around the bend. Time fer me to start puttin some down payments on some little what nots fer my Sweety Deety Jolene. So I hope that fer all a you what will be fannin' yourselves with all that money from my picks what I just gave you well, don't ferget me ... and Jolene neither! So git on over to www.jugmongers.com - that's jugmongers with a "J" - and set me up with some of that pumpkin pie!
This here is Judd Jugmonger signin' off with some words a wisdoms ... especially fer that thar Jet's coach what's mouth overloaded his butt last Sunday: All right here it goes: If y'all think the sun come up just to hear you crow ... don't be surprised when your ears begin to grow ... (hee haw, hee haw)
Sunday, November 1, 2009
Well howdy folks! This here is Judd Jugmonger, once again live from the Katywonkered Cafe' - and this here is muh picks fer Week 8 of the NFL, that thar's the Nat-ee-onal Football League. Where there's a full-back, a half-back and quarterback ... but thar ain't no fiddlebacks ... though I reckon if a y'all like Bluegrass music as a much as I do you mind a few in the stands.
Now last week, I picked 8 of them games. Yes sir - that thar was good I reckon' ... 'cept no one sent me some of that thar BBQ sauce I asked ya to git me! Well, maybe this week y'all will be more kindly especially as I'm all fired up after singin' all night at the Halloween Hootenanny. So Let's get on it.
Carolina Panthers (2-4) at Arizona Cardinals (4-2)
Ok, first up is them Panthers vs. Cardinals. Will them kitties git the bird? I think so .... but it won't be the eatin' kind.
San Francisco 49ers (3-3) at Indianapolis Colts (6-0)
All right, that was an easy one. Now we got us them Colts vs them 49ers. I reckon there's a gonna be a stampede. Them boys from San Francisco are a gonna end up lookin' like rice-a-roni ... and you know that thar will be Peyton Manning's eatin' treat. Now them 49ers have been makin' some moves on their roster ... but uh ... I think them movements are as about as useful as a trap door in a canoe.
Houston Texans (4-3) at Buffalo Bills (3-4)
Ok now we got us them Texans vs. them Bills. This one here is a toss up. So I just spun my little pigskin what I got and it pointed to them Texans.... now I think Buffalo Boys have more to lose than a fat tick that's a gonna squashed ... but I think them Houston boys are a gonna give them a few wrinkles ... and my little pigskin agrees. So, go with the Texans, Hoss.
Cleveland Browns (1-6) at Chicago Bears (3-3)
All right we got us them Browns vs. them Bears. Knock Knock .... who's that thar ... "Bear Claw" ... uh ... Bear claw who's that thar? Bear claw ... and that's all she wrote. Them Browns are a gonna have to changes their names to black and blues.
Jacksonville Jaguars (3-3) at Tennessee Titans (0-6)
Next up is them 3 and 3 Jaguars vs. them 0 and 6Titans. Will this be the week that Tennessee is a gonna see a victory? I reckon not. Them Jacksonville boys are a gonna go through them faster than green grass through a goose!
St. Louis Rams (0-7) at Detroit Lions (1-5)
All right, next up we go us them 0 and 7 Rams vs them 1 and 5 Lions. I's the Loser's Bowl! Swing low sweet chariot comin' forth to carry the "poor rams" home. I tell you what if someone's a gonna walk out that thar outhouse smellin' like flowers it's a gonna be them Lions. I'll say it again, poor rams.
Seattle Seahawks (2-4) at Dallas Cowboys (4-2)
- Ok, next up it's them Seahawks and then Cowboys. Hmmm. Tony Romo vs. Matt Hassleback. I think that thar football is a gonna be airborn so much this week's, it's a gonna sprout wings. So who's a gonna git the Pabst blue ribbon? Well, I think them Cowboys have got the edge and they will find way to throw them Seattle boys over it.
Minnesota Vikings (6-1) at Green Bay Packers (4-2)
- Ok, now we got us a game to watch. If thar's a few a you what like watchin' Nascar a hopin' fer a crash, well this here will be a game fer you. Bert Favre and his Vikings are a gonna show up with the ugly stick and when they're through they're a gonna make them Green Bay boys sooo ugly they could run a dog off a meat wagon. The Packers will ride the short bus home from the stadium. Sorry, boys.
New York Giants (5-2) at Philadelphia Eagles (4-2)
Ok, it's them Giants vs. them Eagles. Hey y'all remember in that thar King Kong movie when them little planes were a buzzin' round that overgrown monkey what was on the Empire State Buildin'? Remember how that thar Donkey Kong swatted them down like gnats on a backside? Well that's what Eli Manning and Company is a gonna do to them Philadelphia birds. The only things flyin' on Sunday will be some buzzards lookin' fer Eagle roadkill.
Miami Dolphins (2-4) at New York Jets (4-3)
All right, fer me this here is the game of the week. It's my Dolphins vs. them Jets. Come on you wildcat! Now I tell you what, in all my born days I'd never such rotten officiatin' during that thar game what we had last week against them Saints. Them striped zebras boys oughts to be tar and feathered fer them calls. And I still got me the shakes from that thar 2nd half metldown! But this week is another week and like I always say ... tomorrow is another day. ... and I reckon it's another game the Jets will take a nose dive. Hope Mark Sanchez won't be wearin' white!
Oakland Raiders (2-5) at San Diego Chargers (3-3)
Now it's them Chargers vs. them Raiders.... ok quick pick .... cause a this one's a gonna be a stinker! There will be as many thrills as watchin a pack a slow movin' turtles. I'd go with them Chargers, but I could just as easily say them Raiders... and that thar's the truth! If there's a shuffle board match on TV ... well, go ahead and watch it then.
Denver Broncos (6-0) at Baltimore Ravens (3-3)
All right! It's them 6 and 0 Broncos vs. them 3 and 3 Ravens. Now I think, that if thar's an undefeated team what is gonna lose this week .. well ... it won't be them Ravens. I prognosticate the Ravens will fly high again and the only way them Broncos are gonna be able to share the air with them will be if and they git on back to "Mile High" stadium.
Atlanta Falcons (4-2) at New Orleans Saints (6-0)
All right it's Monday Night Football and it's them 4 and 2 Falcons vs. them Saints 6 and 0 Saints. Call me crazier than dog what's been run over ... but I think them Saints are a gonna fall to them Falcons .... HAHA - Just Joshin' with you folks! It will take a miracle for them Atlanta boys to go a peckin on them New Orleans boys any higher than their toes.
All right! That's it's fer me folks. That thar is muh picks! Now, I tell you what, as it's the 1st of November, the holiday season is just around the corner. So I'm gettin' a hankerin' fer some pumpkin pie. Well, fer all a you folks who will be plannin' what to buy their friends and kin with all that thar money from my picks what I just gave you well, don't ferget me!. Heck, I'd be happy if ya send me even a little slice, but don't ferget that thar whipped toppin! Just spray some on thar fer me. So git on over to www.jugmongers.com - that's jugmongers with a "J" - and set me up with some of that pumpkin pie!
This here is Judd Jugmonger signin' off with a Halloween incantation: "Double, double toil and trouble; fire burn and cauldron bubble ... send ole' Judd Jugmonger some pumpkin pie on the double." I thank you. I thank you very much.
Friday, October 23, 2009
Well howdy folks! This here is Judd Jugmonger, once again live from the Katywonkered Cafe' - and this here is muh picks fer Week 7 of the NFL, that thar's the National Football League, where a tight-end and a defensive end are two very different things. Now last week, I had to eat me some crow a bit fer some a muh picks. I picked 6 straight on but came up as short as "Uncle Nort" form that good "Ole Mountain Dew" song ... on some other 8 games. I reckon this week is a gonna be good. So let's get on it!
Atlanta Falcons (4-1) at Dallas Cowboys (3-2)
All right, first up we got us them Falcons and them Cowboys. Them Dallas boys are "home, home on the range" ... though more than likely they're a gonna be more like lost on the range. Cause I reckon that thar Matt Ryan a gonna find him some holes in that thar Dallas defense.
Chicago Bears (3-2) at Cincinnati Bengals (4-2)
Ok, now we got us them Bears vs. them Bengals. Hmmm seems like this one's gonna have lots a clawin' goin' on. Will them Bengals lose their stripes again this week like they did with them Texans? Now I tell you what, I think that thar Jay Cutler's in the pressure cooker to perform what with all that new money he's a gonna be gittin rom that new contract. So, I think he's a gonna git the tiger by the tail this week ... the Bengal tiger that is.
Indianapolis Colts (5-0) at St. Louis Rams (0-6)
Next up is them Colts vs. them Rams .... Poor rams. What else do y'all want me to say? it's a 5-0 team vs. a O-6 team. It don't take a rocket scientist to know where to pin the tail on the donkey fer this game.
Minnesota Vikings (6-0) at Pittsburgh Steelers (4-2)
All right, now we got us Minnesota vs. Pittsburgh. Burt Favre proved me wrong last week - I admit it. And he is a aimin' fer 7 and 0 ... but I still think them Vikings are due fer the short end of the eatin' stick ... and I think them Steeler's gunslingere ole' Roethlisberger is a gonna be a busier than a one-armed paper-hanger .... it's gonna be a tough one .. but I say go with them Steelers.
New England Patriots (4-2) at Tampa Bay Buccaneers (0-6)
Next up is them Patriots and them Buccaneers. Now they're a off to London this week to share a bowl of some "Cheerios" with the Queen and to show them good folks from across the pond what some smash mouth football is all about. Only problem is that Tampa Bay is still one can short of a six-pack ... and ole' Tom Brady's is a gonna make sure it's stay's that way. So it's... "Pip Pip" fer New England... and Zip Zip fer them Buccaneers.
Buffalo Bills (2-4) at Carolina Panthers (2-3)
Ok, it's them Bills vs. them Panthers. Now Buffalo surprised me last week by beatin' the Jets. But them Carolina boys ... well they performed as expected. To tell y'all truth, I think the thrills in this game are a gonna be as scarce as hen's teeth. So I just gave my little pigskin a spin ... and ... well ... as expected it pointed to them Panthers. ... so that's what I'm expectin' ... and I don't aim to drink no "expectorant" if the Bills shoot down my expectations. Know what I mean? I think you do.
San Francisco 49ers (3-2) at Houston Texans (3-3)
All right, yonder comes them 49ers vs them Texans. Now them 49ers are comin' off a a bye week this week uh .. what they had last week... uh .. maybe they best be takin' another week off cause I think them Houston boys are a gonna 86 them 49ers like they did with them kitty cats last week from Cincinatti.
Green Bay Packers (3-2) at Cleveland Browns (1-5)
Let's see now we got us them 3 and 2 Packers vs. them 1 and 5 Browns. Hmm.. Now last week. them Cleveland Boys look plumb tuckered out ... and them Packers .. well they sort looked like they were hotter than a ... well at least a $1 pistol, I reckon ... so I just as well will stick with them over Mangini's boys.
San Diego Chargers (2-3) at Kansas City Chiefs (1-5)
Next up. another 1 and 5 team. It's them Chiefs and them 2 and 4 Chargers. Now, if and theres's one thing I love it's BBQ sauce from Kansas City. So when them San Diego boy's go to town on them Cheifs ... well, I hope they will be kindly enough to save fer me some of that thar BBQ sauce after they git finished BBQing Kansas City.
New York Jets (3-3) at Oakland Raiders (2-4)
Ok, we got us next them Jets vs, them Raiders. Mark Sanchez ... well, I guess he's been feelin' lower than a ... well let me just put to y'all this way: he's like poor boy who a has ta borrow him some money to buy some water to cry with. Now them Oakland boys, well, they were good as grits this week ... but I think it's gonna be them who a gonna be doin' the cryin'.
Arizona Cardinals (3-2) at New York Giants (5-1)
Next up is them Cardinals and them Giants. I tell you what, this here is a gonna be a good game! Both of them quarterbacks are a gonna put the ball up in the air. ... and who's a endzone is it a gonna land in the most? I say them Giants. Peyton Manning is a hungry. Look out! The menu says bird is the catch of the day.
New Orleans Saints (5-0) at Miami Dolphins (2-3)
All right, I tell you what, this next game here is my game of the week. It's muh Dolphins vs. them Saints. The Saints are still undefeated ... and well that don't bode too well when teams like that come to Miami. The Dolphins are 2 and 3 ... but that don't mean much cause they got that thar "wild cat". Of course, San Diego has got Drew Brees... Now they may "call him the breeze" ... but them Fins are a gonna blow him and his team down the road. Big upset here folks... and y'all heard it here first! Go with the Fins!
Philadelphia Eagles (3-2) at Washington Redskins (2-4)
All right! Monday night Football! It's them Eagles goin' against them Redskins. Now them boys from Washington are a lookin' like they are as limber as a dishrag ... so I guess them Philadelphia boys is gonma do more than just dishes with the Eagles. I suspect they is a gonna mop the floor ... and even the outhouse with them.
All right! That's it's fer me folks. That thar is muh picks - now, I tell you what, if y'all remembered I said that I'd like me some BBQ sauce. Well, fer all a you folks who will be a rollin' in the dough from my picks what I just gave you well, don't ferget me!. So git on over to www.jugmongers.com - that's jugmongers with a "J" - and set me up with some of that BBQ sauce ...!
This here is Judd Jugmonger signin' off with some words of advice ... A whistling woman and a crowing hen never comes to a very good end. That thar means: be what y'all are supposed ... yourselves.
Friday, October 16, 2009
Well howdy folks! I've updated my podcast fer my picks fer week 6 of the NFL. I'm postin' the transcript below fer y'all what don't like listenin' to muh voice! Enjoy!
This here is Judd Jugmonger, once again live from the Katywonkered Cafe' - and this here is muh picks fer Week 6 of the NFL, that thar's the National Football League. Where them perfessional players are as big as an icebox - whereas some them amatuer players cain't afford an ice box. Now last week, I picked 9 of them games again. Yes sir - that thar was good! So let's get on it!
All right first up we got us them Redskins vs. them Chiefs. That thar is a regular pow wow. But I it's gonna be them Redskins that are gonna be beatin' the war drums on them Chiefs hides. The Chief should run fer the hills ... but the truth be known .. it don't look like the Chief's an run .... nor can they stop the run.
Next is them Browns and them Steelers. Looks like theirs gonna be lots stealin' goin' ... cause them brown receivers can't seem to hold on to the ball much! Now folks it ain't a wild hog its just a little pigskin. If y'all are a gonna drop the ball so much - well ya might as well just drop your pants and git.
Ok, it's them Giants and them Saints. I tell you what, them Giants ran fer like two hundered and twenty yards last week .... and oh yeah they got them Eli Manning too! Cain St. Drew Brees perform a miracle in Giant's Stadium? I reckon not. If y'all are Saints fans ... well, I'd startin' prayin' early on on Friday.
Next is them Arizoney Cardinals vs. them Seattle Seahawks. Matt Hasslebeck is back ... say that 5 times I dare you. He likes to throw ball lots. And, well ... them Cardinals sure seem to like them opposing quarterback to throw ball a lot. So reckon we know where this here game in a gonna end up. Kurt Warner, you say? Yep her sure like to throw ball lots too ... but as they say across the pond ... it will be all fer naught.
All right . Now we got us them Panthers vs. them Buccaneers. Tampa Bay is O and 5. This here game ought to be called the "Slippery Sloppy Bowl" cause I prognosticate there's gonna a be lots a balls a slippin' and a slidin' away from both teams. It shivers me timbers to say it ... if folks, but I don't think them Bucaroos is a gonna be very Jolly Rogers like again this week. Sorry boys.
Now, them Lions go up against them boys from Green Bay. The Lions are 1 and 4. But you know, they say even a blind hog can find it an acorn ever now and then. And I tell you what I think Gang Green Green is gonna be a just that this week. Gang green.
Ok, it's them Baltimore Raves vs. Minnesota Vikings. Joe Flacco vs. Burt Favre. Hmmm ... now some folks say the Vikings, at 5 and 0, are goin' to the super bowl this year. Well, I think Joe Flacco is gonna give them purple boys a bit of a speed bump this week and the wrong end of the stick, if you know what I mean. I think you do.
All right it's them Jaguars vs. them Rams. Now I tell you what, Cousin Jedidiah said that I've been mighty hard on them Rams of late... and I reckon he's right. But I tell you what .. it ain't gonna be me eatin' the crow the week ... it's gonna be them Rams again. O and 6 is a callin' and it ain't fer them Jaguars. Poor Rams.
Now we got us them Eagles vs. them Raiders. Heck, thar ain't no raisin' sand over this one - what with the Raiders feelin' poorly and all. Take the Eagles, hoss!
Them Bengals boys have won their last four games. Glory be. I tell you what ... I betcha they don't make it to 5 straight. Now, Carson Palmer has been a runnin' and a runnin' all over that thar pocket... and some folks think that thar's a good thang! If an iut were me I'd be might tired what with all that scramblin' around. It also seems to me that them Texans have had their time in the wood shed - so I think this here's the week that they put that thar Palmer outta his misery.
Now last week my Dolphin's made ole' Rex Ryan and his Jets look like bumps on a log at the end that thar game last week. Well done boys - y'all made me proud - and I'm gonna miss y'all this bye week . But ... mean while them Jet's go after them Bills this week. Someone's a gonna pay ... and it looks like them Bills ... well they just ain't got no credit. And the next comin' of Broadway Joe? Well, I think he'll be smilin' purty fer the cameras come Monday.
All right, it's them Tennessee Titans vs. them New England Patriots. Now I hear that thar Tom Brady is still mighty sore after last week's losin'. I seen Tom Brady when he's angry ... and I do declare that he's gonna go a hog wild on them Texans ... who'll be takin' the short bus home from the stadium.
Ok, we got us them Bears vs them Falcons. Both teams are 3 and 1 and ... well I tell you what, I had to give my little pigskin a spin on this one ... and it pointed to them Falcons. I think this here game is more important to them Falcons than it is them Bears. Them Falcons can catch them Saints ,,,,, there ain't no way them Bear is a gonna catch them Vikings .. no way no how.
All right! It's Monday Night Football - and it's them Chargers vs. them Broncos. You know, my sweety deety Jolene says that "the Sun don't shine on the same dog's tail all the time". She thinks them Broncos at 5 and 0 are due fer a spill. Can the Chargers git charged up to give it to 'em? I reckon not ... but I think them Broncos are gonna shoot themselves in the foots this week, some how.
All right! That's it's fer me folks. That thar is muh picks - now, I tell you what, if you like them buffalo wings half as much as I do then you'll understand that I just know that all you kindly folks out thar who'll be winnin' big with my picks what I just gave to you, well y'all are a gonna want to send me some a your winnin's thar. And I and my kin will thank you to do so. So git ahead on over to www.jugmongers.com - that's Jugmongers with a "J" - and see how y'all can set me up with some buffalo wings fer the week!
This here is Judd Jugmonger signin' off with some words of wisdom ... Be happy with what y'all got until y'all git what y;all want.
Sunday, October 11, 2009
I hope y'all are comin' a long with y'alls Halloween preperationals! In honor of all them pumpkins and bumpkins this month we put up, on our MySpace site, a new song what we recorded live in Juno, Florida some time ago. It's gonna be another what we put our CD, "Jugmongers: Live At The Hootenanny!". Hope y'all enjoy! Check it out at: www.myspace.com/jugmongers
In the mean time, to git y'all in the spirits, here are a some a my favorite Halloween Jokes:
Olive and Phillip.
Olive and Phillip who?
Olive Halloween so Phillip my tricker treatin' bag cus we is goin' tricker treatin!
2)What does a witch eat at the beach?A Sandwitch on a stick!!
3) Why didn't the ghost go to the halloween hootenanny? Cuz he had no body to go with!! !
4) Knock, Knock
How are my going to get in to give me your money if you don't open the door?
5)What does a skeleton order at a restaurant?
All the best!
- Judd Jugmonger
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Well howdy folks! This here is Judd Jugmonger, once again live from the Katywonkered Cafe' - and this here is muh picks fer Week 5 of the NFL, that thar's the National Football League. Where them big boys play in the Good Ole USA ... and they don't wear little shorts neither... Now last week, I picked 9 correctly of them games. Yes sir - that thar was good!
Ok, first up we got them Cowboys and them Cheifs .... that's thar's a regular game a cowboys and injuns. Well, it looks like Tony Romo and company are a gonna do what Eli Manning and company did to them Cheif's last week. That's right. Cheifs take the short bus home from the stadium once again.
Next up is them Vikings and them Rams. I tell you what, I feel sorry fer them Rams, cause I think Bert Favre is a gonna take a few nips of that thar special "Geritol" he got himself thar and git his team all fired up again - just like he done last week against his old team in Green Bay. Poor Rams.
All right. It's the Browns vs. the Bills. Now, both a them teams found themselves down in the dumps last week. So, who's a gonna win the battle of the losers this week? Well, I think the Bills are fairly ornery what with the tar and featherin' they got down in Miami. At O and 4 the Browns just cain't git out a the dog-house ... or the outhouse ... or wherever it is they is.
Ok, Them Steelers vs. them Lions. Now I was wrong about them Steelers last week gitin' zapped and all. I admit it. But this week ... I just think them Lions is gonna git back some of their growl. Go with Detroit!
Hey, y'all ever hear of a "New York Cheer"? Well, that what them Raiders are a gonna be hearin' a ringing in their heads this Sunday... and probably all next week .. even though Eli Mannin' seems to be hobblin' about on one foot.
All right. now it's them Bucanneers and them Eagles. Them boys from Tampa Bay have been sleepin' with the fishes the past few weeks. Now I think they is a startin' to wake up ... but first they gotsta find their way outta Davy Jones Locker... cause them Eagles have flown off with the key. Take the Eagles "hoss".
Now it's the Redskins and the Panthers. Nothin' could be finer than be to be in Caroliner .... and don't the Panthers know it! Them Redskins won't know what hit 'em.
Bengals Vs. them Ravens. Both teams are 3 and 1. Looks like them Balitmore fellers might have a field day with them Bengals. Joe Flacco is a gonna go whacko on them Bengals. Yep, you heard it here, boys.
Ok, it's them Falcons vs. them 49ers. Now this one was a mighty hard one fer me to pick. So I just spun me my little pigskin here... and it pointed to them Falcolns. I cain't not disagree. It's gonna be a close one, though.
All right. Now we gotta a battle betwixt them 1 and 2 Cardinals and them 2 and 2 Texans ... a 1 a 2 a 1 2 3 5 ... oops that don't add up ... and neither does Arizoney's running game. Sorry boys.
Ok, it's them Jaguars vs them Seahawks. Them kitties from J-A-X proved me wrong last week. So I'm a gonna go with them ... especially how them Seatle boys are still feelin' poorly.
Ok, Tom Brady and his Patriots roll into Denver this week and face them 4-0 Broncos. The Broncos are 4 and 0? Imagine that! Well I don't reckon they is a gonna make it 5 and 0. And I don't think it takes a rocket scientist to figure out that one, neither.
Now it's them Colts vs. them Titans. Peyton Mannin' and the Colts are a sittin pretty at the top o' the four corners of the world .... looks like them Titans are still sittin' in the outhouse, though. Will thar be a big upset this week? I reckon not.
All right MONDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL and the game of the week. It's them Jets and them Dolphins. I think the next comin' a "Broadway Joe" got rattled last week... and my Fins ... well they done me proud. Lets make it 2 in a row boys ... keep that runnin' game goin'. Oh .. and Mark Sanchez? Well I think he's a gonna need a powder again this week.
That's it's fer me folks. That thar is muh opicks! Now, I tell you what, fer all a y'all that win big on muh "insights" - well - go ahead and send me some a your winins ... If and you do ... I do you some BBQ ribs with all the fixin's ...heck, I'll even throw in a beer. I promise. Go to www.jugmongers.com - that's jugmongers with a "J" - and see how you can send me some money fer that thar BBQ. I thank you kindly.
All right. This here is Judd Jugmonger signin' off with some words of wisdom ... when in doubt ... go fer the endzone.
Sunday, October 4, 2009
This here is Judd Jugmonger. Guess what? Some kin suggested that I do a podcast with my weekly picks fer the NFL - that thar's American Football for those a you not here in the good ole' USA. Ya see, ever week I go down to the Katywonkered Cafe' and have some key lime pie and what not ... and give my picks to all that's thar. So we decided to record my picks and put them up in the Internet. I'm workin' to git the podcast up on the Internet - but in the meantime here is my Week 4 picks what I said in my podcast. I reckon you'd a call this a transcript. Ok ... here it goes .... close you eyes and pertend y'all can hear me a talkin' .....
Howdy! This here is Judd Jugmonger and I'm live from the Katywonkered Cafe' - and this here is my picks for the NFL, that thar's the National Football League - thar ain't no soccer thar ... just good ole' American passin' and handin' off the pigskin fer a touchdown.
So this here is a week 4. And here we go...
Ok - We got us the Ravens Vs. the Patriots. Looks like them Pats is a gonna have them a feast today - but it ain't gonna be crow ... them Ravens is on the menu - the way I see it.
All right now the Redskins, well they play them thar Buccaneers. I tell you what... someone is a gonna get scalped ... so thar ain't gonna be no "yo ho ho" in Tampa today.
Ok - Now we got us the Titans from Tennessee vs. them Jaguars from Jacksonville... now you know I like them Florida teams ... but I tell you what ... them kitties are a gonna git themselves squashed in a Bluegrass Stomp care a the good ole' boys from a Tennessee.
Next up is them Raiders from Oakland vs. them Texans from Houston - Now the way I see it is that the only raidin' them raiders are gonna do is the icebox fer some comfort food... when the Texans make road kill outta them.
Ok - The Bears vs. The Lions .. who's a gonna be the king a the jungle this week? Well them thar Lions are gonna have to do them some learnin' to "Grin and Bear it" cause I think them boys from Chicago are a gonna show em' their bear claws. Look out ...
All right now we got us some Ohio boys -but it ain't the Buckeyes ... it's them Bengals from Cincinnati and them Browns from Cleveland... I tell you what we is a gonna see a lot brown tonight cause them Bengals are fixin' to kick them some Cleveland butt.
Ok, who's next - bring em on... let's see we got us here ... the Giants vs. the Chiefs... Looks like the Chiefs will be ridin' the short bus home from the stadium... Eli Manning and Co. is gonna spring for the gas - I hear.
All right - now we got us the Jets Vs. the Saints. Mark Sanchez... well that thar pretty boy is doin' a bang up job up North thar. But some folks think the Saints are gonna make em' pray ... but I tell you what I think them Jets are gonna send them Saints back to seminary school.
All right - game of the week - them Fins vs. the Bills. Now y'all know I'm a big Miami fan form way back and them fish a gonna start them a new QB tonight what's name is Chad Henne .... not Penny. Now even though them Dolphins are down by three ... I think there's gonna be a resurrections this week. Now Buffalo' a playin' good these days .... but they is a gonna be fish food tonight. If and they don't ... well someone here's a gonna pitch a fit.
That's right - you heard it here first.
Ok - it's the Cowboys and the Broncos who are unbeaten ... well not for long that is.
All right - next up is the Rams vs. the 49s - Them boys from St. Louis ain't won a game yet ... I reckon it's gonna stay that way this week too. Poor rams....
Now it's the Chargers vs. them Steelers.... I think the Steelers are gonna git zapped ... it's gonna be a close one though....
Finally Monday Night Football - Them Packers vs. them Vikings... good game .... break out the beer cause Burt Favre ... gonna send his old team Packin'...
Well that's a bout it ... that thar is muh picks - now if and some a y'all are the bettin' kind and ya'll win some Liquor money ... well, I hope y'all be kind enough to share some with me - especially how I gave y'all them picks here. So send me your money - go to www.jugmongers.com and see how you can send me some money fer some beer or what not. I thank you kindly.
All right. This here is Judd Jugmonger signin' off with some of advice ...remember - everyday above ground .... is a good one.
Monday, September 14, 2009
We is a thrilled as a hog in slop. We got us a new song up on the MySpace! It's "Ya Can't Put That On Stick" from our forthcomin' "Jugmongers: Live at the Hootenanny" tapes! That thar is the song we sang a bit a on our video "Cookin' With The Jugmongers".
Now, we're still a workin' as a hard as we can on makin' this here record. Of course, there is recession on and we still need some money ... cause uh .. we are mighty nervous about the healthcare debate and other stuff.
Seems like lots a folk these days are concerned , too - what with this one revenuer a callin' the persident a liar and some such foolishness. Now, yes I seen that thar fellow and lots a his friends sittin' in that thar meetin' lookin' all pruney faced and like they had just sucked on a sour toad or somethin'. Meanwhile there was these other folk a jumpin up and down about the President Obama's talk. Now, I reckon I'd rather be jumpin up and down than sittin like bump on a log anyday, especially when it's football season again! So I guess that puts me in that thar happy camp.
So if and y'all gots your knickers in a twist over the healthcare debate, go on a give our song a listen - it's free! Have a beer, too - and it will be just like your own personal healthcare package.
Here's the link: www.myspace.com/jugmongers
All the best,
- Judd Jugmonger
Sunday, July 19, 2009
But meanwhile, surprise surprise! I found this here little ditty what I wrote fer my honey doll Jolene a ways back called "I Love You truly Jolene". So I put it up fer y'all to hear. We recorded it sometime back at a Hootenanny in Lokasee, Florida - and a big "howdy" to the kind folks up there who had us.
Now, if ya listen closely, y'all can hear me doin' a bit o yodelin' on there. No... I don't perfess to be a good yodeler like Bill Monroe was... but I did my best. Cain't reach them high notes nomore what with all that pickin' and a blowin' goin' on. Anyways I hope y'all enjoy it.
By the ways, fer those a yous who don't know bout my sweety pie Jolene (and me) ... well she ain't the Jezebel what Dolly Parton wrote about in her song and which Rhonda Vincent, the queen of Bluegrass, and her the band the "Rage" sang the britches off uh. That was a different song. This one here is mine what I wrote fer my Jolene. My darlin' Jolene is a sweety deety and the "apple on the stick" a my eyes, (even though she don't like my missin' tooth none).
Well that's it fer now! And now some words a wisdom: "If it feels good, do it. If you got a problem, blame somebody else." ... no I didn't say that ... former president George W. Bush Jr did. So says him.
Here's the link: http://www.myspace.com/jugmongers
All the best!
- Judd Jugmonger
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
This here is Judd Jugmonger again, lettin' y'all know that we gotta us new video up just in time for the 4th of July, Independence Day celebration.... it's very educational, too. See, like I and some kin we're sayin' to ourselves that there ain't enough recipes's on the web for folks like us who like to do their eatin' on a stick. So we made this here video to give y'all an idea of how it goes in these parts.... especially at this time a year when fish fries and BBQs are a feedin' the fires of July.
It was shot both in our studio and at the Katywonkered Cafe'. and we are much obliged to Cousin Justin and Cousin Janey for allowin' us the use of their premises... especially since the revenuers closed it down for sanitation purposes. So go on and git your stick if you're able and pay tuned to this video.
Also, in the video we git to sing a bit a part of a song what I wrote what's called "You can't put that on a stick". We do it bluegrass style. Most likely, we'll put the entire song up soon what we recorded at one of the hootennanys we was at.
Other news: Not too many folks have sent us their money yet. So go on and do so now.... time's a wastin' and the economic regression is only gettin' worse. We's a makin' a record and now a 'cookin book too ... so get on it!
Happy 4th of July to y'all! Hope you enjoy yours BBQs!
- Judd Jugmonger
PS. If y'all got any good recipes for viddles what go on stick ... send them along to me! I'd be much obliged.
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Times are hard! Seem I reads somewhere this mornin' that over there in Europe they got their britches all in a twist 'bout our government's plan to spend hunderds of billions of dollars to revive its economy. Meanwhile, over here in the US the governments scroungin' about lookin' to get back that BIG money what they gave to "AIG" and what they then gave away as a bonuses to people who don't even work there no more. Boy, it's makes me madder than hell to see them slick suit wearin bankers think they can ask fer a handout from the government and then fly off in their lear jets and what not and spend the cash on themselves and their freinds. Some good ole boys oughsta catch up with them katty-wonkered folks and open up a can a' whoopass on 'em.
If AIG were so intersted in savin' their big company, they shoulda tried my "I want to make big money" now plan - what it shows in the video above.
Well, that's it fer now. Hope y'all are doin' the best ya can.
- Judd Jugmonger
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Now seein' as I'm a feller who likes to share good info with his kin and freinds, I thought I might let y'all in on the fact that, see, these idears are SCAMS. There ain't no way to turn $6 into $24600 simply by sendin' $6 to 6 strangers. And, if you think that I as your friend am a gonna send you even a 1$ on this foolishness then you are nuttier than a Snickers bar. It's no wonder you probably rode in to school on the short bus.
Now, that bein' said ... if you want to make some REAL BIG MONEY without pissin' off yer kinfolk and friends. Do this:
1) Go to the website: http://www.jugmongers.com/
2) Click on the link that says: Judd Jugmonger's "I want to make BIG MONEY now!" plan.
3) Go ahead and buy an autograhped Jugmonger's T-Shirt fer $15.
4) I will send you one of ours T-Shirts and $1.
5) When you receive the T-Shirt, go ahead and sell it fer $25!
If y'all were followin' the math here then that means you will earn $11! Wow! Just like that.
6) To make the BIG MONEY, repeat the above steps a hundered times. In no time at all you will make $1100! Now, I reckon that you can do this about 50 times a month - so that's a $55,000 - and seein' as there are 12 months a year that comes to a whoppin' $660,000. That's like more than half a million dollars! You just can't beat that with a whoopin' stick!
7) (Optional) Share your good fortune. Copy the above steps word fer word into an e-mail and send it to all yer kin and pals. Don't forget to put in the fact that you like to watch "Oprah" a lot ... that's "Oprah" NOT "Opry". Those of you who know the difference between a radio and a TV oughtsta know that!
Well that's about it! I hope y'all fare well with this here plan. And now some words of inspiration: "Life ain't worth living, if you ain't living." - I said that.
Catch you on the flip flop,
- Judd Jugmonger
PS. If any of y'all see cousin Jed, tell him to git on home. We're hungry.
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
So that's what this entry is all about... just to say howdy and give a holler to our kin out there. Oh we have a video out there, which gives y'all a better idea of who we are. I'd be mighty obliged if you give it a look:
So I think by now you know what this here is all about. To help to give us a helpin' hand go to our website: http://www.jugmongers.com
If y'all want to hear some more of our music you can check out our MySpace site at http://www.myspace.com/jugmongers
Stay tuned at this here blog for more information about our "going ons" and especially our upcoming Hootenannies. One thing I'd also like to do on this here blog is tell you about some of the good folk who make indie music on MySpace... escpecially the ones I like. Ya see, I like to troll around MySpace looking for good music and friends ... so if any of y'all are musicians out there in MySpace land and you would like me to take a look at your MySpace site ... just give me a holler. Also, if you think you might be our kin, you can do the same.
Ok, that's it for now. Remember to have a good day and that, as I always say, "everyday above ground is a good one."
Catch you on the flip flop,
- Judd Jugmonger
PS. My Darlin' Jolene says to give y'all a big "hey" ... so I just did.